Advent Through the Lens of Grief: Week Four – Love
We are four weeks into the Advent journey. We have examined hope, peace, and joy. Now we turn our attention to love. For many, Advent and Christmas can be especially painful after the death of a loved one, raising quiet but difficult questions about God’s love in grief.
Love is a word we use often, yet grief can complicate its meaning. When someone we love dies, it can feel as though love itself has failed us. We equate love with protection, with safety, with being spared from deep pain. And when loss comes anyway, we are left asking hard questions.
If God is love, why didn’t He stop this?
Advent invites us to sit with that question—not to rush past it, but to look at love through the story God has been telling all along.
God’s Love Remembered Through Sacred Rhythms
Throughout Scripture and the life of the Church, God has given His people rhythms of remembrance. Some were instituted directly by God; others were shaped by the people of God across generations. All of them point us back to Him.
- Passover reminded the nation of Israel of God’s deliverance from slavery and His faithfulness to His covenant (Exodus 12:13–14).
- The Feasts reminded the nation of Israel of God’s provision, presence, and sustaining care throughout the year (Leviticus 23:4–5).
- Lent reminds us of our need for repentance and our dependence on Christ’s sacrificial love.
- The Lord’s Supper reminds us of Christ’s body given and His blood poured out for us (Luke 22:19–20).
- Advent recalls Christ’s first coming and anticipates the promise of His second.
Every tradition is an act of love—not sentimental love, but covenant love. Love that remembers. Love that waits. Love that enters suffering and promises redemption.
Advent Love: A Love That Entered a Broken World
When we look at the Scriptures surrounding Advent love, they consistently point us to the birth of Christ:
- He would be born of a virgin and would have a name: Immanuel, “God with us” (Isaiah 7:14).
- He would come from Bethlehem, from the tribe of Judah (Micah 5:2).
- He is the eternal Word of God, present from the beginning (John 1:1–2).
- He dwelt among us and offered salvation to all who would believe (John 1:9–14).
- This gift of salvation comes with a promise: we are children of God and will one day be with Him (1 John 3:1–2).
- His ultimate expression of love was laying down His life as an atoning sacrifice for our sins (1 John 4:9–10).
Advent love reminds us that God’s answer to grief was not distance, but incarnation—God with us. Love, according to Scripture, is not primarily about comfort. It is about presence. It is about God choosing to enter our brokenness rather than remain distant from it.
God’s Love When Grief Brings Loss
If I am honest, I have struggled with God’s love. My understanding of love has been shaped by feeling secure and cared for—by believing that God’s love would protect me and the people I love from harm.
In the midst of loss, I learned that this was never a promise God made.
And that realization led to a painful question: How can this still be called love?
God’s plan began in eternity and will never end. He sees life from a perspective I cannot fully grasp. His love did not offer a temporary rescue from pain, but an eternal rescue from death. It opened the door to relationship—with Him and with one another—now and forever.
It was a price only He could pay. And it was costly.
Song of Love, Week Four — When Love Crossed Over by Rita Baloche
This Advent week, I find it fitting to reflect on a song centered on the birth of Christ.
When Love Crossed Over tells the story of Jesus’ act of love—leaving heaven to come to earth. Not with power or spectacle, but with humility. Not to avoid suffering, but to enter it.
Excerpt:
One glorious night
When love crossed over
And cast aside
Both crown and throne
To live beside
The common man
As was foretold
The Promised One
Love crossed over—into flesh, into frailty, into grief. This is Advent love.
Finding God’s Love in Grief During Advent
This Advent, my prayer is that you would find hope, peace, joy, and love—not by pretending grief isn’t real, but by trusting that love is deeper than loss.
For those who have died in Christ are more alive than we are now. And someday, because of love that crossed over, we will see that fully too.
Reflection Questions
- How has grief shaped your understanding of love?
- Where have you seen God’s love present—not removing pain, but meeting you within it?
- What helps you remember God’s love during Advent?
jthomas
Julie Thomas has a degree in secondary education from Baylor University. She taught and coached for nine years at the secondary level before serving 30 years for Real Options, a pregnancy clinic in Allen, Texas. Her passion is equipping volunteers to talk with women dealing with an unplanned pregnancies. Julie has been married to Marcus for 30+ years, and they have four children: Rachael, Robin, Sara, and Bryan. In 2017, Julie’s life changed forever when she lost her 16-year-old son. Learning to deal with loss in Julie’s life led her to begin a grief ministry, become a certificate in Mental Health Coaching with an understanding of Grief and Loss. REBUILD, Finding Hope After Loss was written by Willow Creek Church in Chicago.
